i don’t know about you, but for me, one of the things that prevents me from moving forward on a lot of creative projects is that ugly little voice in my head, the one that says:
“you don’t really know what you’re doing anyway”
“you’re not good enough.”
“you don’t have the skill or the talent or the creativity that they do”
“this is a frivilous, self-centered waste of time.”
“why bother? you know you’ll never do anything with it anyway?”
it’s so mean! it’s so unkind! and it’s so effective at keeping us from pursuing some of what we are made to do. it keeps all our passion stuck. it robs of us of joy & freedom. and it is quite happy when we listen to it.
in the past few years, more than ever, i have tried to stop listening to it. oh sometimes i let it take its course. “go right ahead,” i say, “just let it rip and get it over with because when you’re done i’m going to do what i love to do anyway.”
yeah, i’m trying to listen to a new voice. it’s wise. and kind. and encouraging. it says things like:
“it’s okay to do it for you”
“what’s in there needs to come out.”
“this will make you feel more alive, more free.”
“you have something to say.”
“this is you, keep walking toward it.”
“just take one step today and don’t worry about the rest.”
“ah, kathy, just let it rip. you’ll feel better afterward.”
i don’t know what voice you’re listening to these days, but i do know this. that evil, unkind voice does not want us to creative. does not want that passion unleashed. does not want freedom for our hearts & our souls. it will rob us and keep us stuck.
so sure, we can let it have its few minutes of our head space, but that’s about it. then tell it to go away and strain to hear the other one. to listen to its call. to respond to the gentle but beckoning to let what’s in us out.
- what’s a new voice you’re trying to listen to?
September 3, 2009 at 8:18 am
So true Kathy!! Thanks for sharing, very inspiring, encouraging!! Love yeah!! Elsx
September 3, 2009 at 9:21 am
Great post…certainly something that has been on my mind for a while. It’s hard to stop listening to those negative intrusive voices…AND sometimes…they aren’t just in your head but coming from the mouths of people all around you.
I still feel a little schizophrenic in regards to the paradigm shift that characterizes my life on the outside of the institutional church vs the inside. I often observe myself in a tug of war with internal and external voices wrestling with liberation.
I feel I am making a little progress…I am SLOWLY learning to trust my ability to appreciate and really hear a different perspective both especially from others…
I am much more free to listen authentically to others with out having to judge them as invalid right up front because they don’t match my orthodoxy or world view…this has without a doubt enriched my life beyond my “expectations” (o:
September 4, 2009 at 2:09 pm
kathy–
love this. thanks for being a good voice in my life. it’s a powerful reminder to stop and listen to my own good voice… the one that says yes, this it. this is where you’ll find life and happiness.
<3
September 6, 2009 at 12:35 am
OK, I’m reading the words here and agreeing, and at the same time in the midst of a creative drought…
I’m forcing myself to post abou this, in hopes that somehow it will put some morsel of my mind and heart out there, priming the pump.
I’ve been here for several years now as I wade through the yuckiest crap— it’s my past! And for whatever reason, just when I need to be able to write, to express, to create, I have all but stopped being able to do any of those things. I keep waiting for my return to creativity; a song, a story, even a teenagish poem… It just isn’t happening!
So here’s to putting it out there in hope of finding my voice… I hope…